Last night I went to a show, which I do not do very often anymore in my old age. I was quickly reminded why it used to make me so agitated back in my more youthful years. I do not mind slam-dancing (as long as I'm out of the circle), the ever-benign and fun skanking (admittedly, I have been known to join in when seeing groups with names that now seem extremely cringe-worthy, e.g. "Mephaskapheles"), or just plain dancing (although crowd surfing really annoys me, just because it seems so unnecessary, and I really don't want to touch some stranger's nasty sweaty body as it's being passed over my head).
What I do mind, however, is being short. Really Short.
My friend Tri, who was raised in America on fast food along with his brother, claims that the two of them are the tallest in their family (Tri is about 6 foot, his brother I believe is taller) because they both ate so much fast food growing up. They come from a large Vietnamese family of little people (ie, 5-footish) and out of nowhere, these two shoot up like skyscrapers. No one in their extended family seems to have these genes, so Tri has determined that the unlikely tallness comes from the growth hormones used in food products such as McDonald's hamburgers, which apparently they ate craploads of growing up.
Tri is not an idiot. He is extremely smart (read: 6-year Medical Program at Boston University, entering med school after 2 years of "normal" college). He is a doctor.
Could this be true? Why the freak wasn't I eating crap like that when I was little? Why was I wasting my time on delicacies such as pig's blood and fish eyes?
I did start to eat a lot of french fries in my later life, however. But I don't think they count.
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